Words cannot begin to describe the facial expression of disgust that my grandmother put up when I brought up the subject. It was as if I had said something so sinful and too unruly to even be mentioned.
From my grandmothers perspective, traditionally it was unheard of for a girl to date more than two men, and she was only expected to lose her viginity to her husband, after she got married. This was because a girl was expected to have a certain level of moral as women were considered the backbone of society. She also went on to say that a girl losing her virginity before marriage was a represantion of loose morals and a huge embarrassment to the family. Since she is also very religious she did not forget to mention to me that in the bible pre-marital sex was forbidden.
I can understand where my grandmother was coming from given her age(89), however that is not to say I agree. Personally I have a totally different viewpoint mainly because I grew up in a more liberal decade and am more scientific than I am religious. I believe that any person should be at liberty to date as many people as possible until they find the person their meant to be, just like you carry out as many experiments as is necessary before you make a final conclusion. I am very liberal also in that I believe a girl should not be forced to live a life for her family's interests and not her own. When it comes to the religious aspect of it I totally disagree because I am pretty sure that a lot of young and older people are engaged in pre-marital sex, mainly because of the society we live in today, and so it is impractical to label all of them as sinners.
Many people have different views when it comes to this issue and so it all depends on who you are and where you come from...
I am so glad you brought this issue up. I feel as though our society has reached a point where sex should no longer be an embarrassing topic to discuss. I think the media has made it a taboo concept that is somehow sinful and people should be ashamed to be involved in the act that is so natural to all living things. I cannot wait for a generation that does not look at sex at anytime whether, pre-marital or post marital, as a shameful idea.
ReplyDeleteI have had some related experiences with my Grandma, as well... my boyfriend commuted and had some problems living at home. At my apartment, there was an empty room for the semester because my roommate was studying abroad. He decided to move in, and the living situation has been awesome. But at a family get-together, my mom told my Grandma about my boyfriend living with me. She was obviously against it, and it showed. She didn't mention it to me personally, but that just shows that it really is an issue with older generations. People change and societies change, but sometimes it hard for older people to get used to those changes. But I think it's great that our generation is evolving and questioning the rules that were deemed "right"; because an idea or rule that was in place and abided for a long time doesn't necessarily mean it is "right" at all.
ReplyDeleteMy grandparents were a bit on the conservative side, too, but I definitely do believe it's a generational issue. Times have changed and it seems that our generation is more open about sex, especially pre-marital sex. I feel like back in the day having sex was more connected to love and marriage, whereas now people our age are sleeping around more and more and getting STDs (but that's another issue). I agree with what you said too about people's views depending on where they're from and how they were raised. It's all a matter of personal beliefs, and sometimes it can be hard to accept others' beliefs.
ReplyDeleteI think now the only thing we need to concern about sex is that whether we could control the consequences. Back into the old time, when people do not have condom or other things to prevent the pregnancy, having pre-marital sex is a very serious issue for them because they could ends up with having a baby. However, nowadays, the scientists creat hundreds of ways to prevent pregnancy, which helped us to come out with ideas that having pre-marital sex will not lead to something terrible. So, why not?
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